Points awarded!

OK, so we've got our first "point" earning arrests of the world cup...

Surprise, surprise. The first three teams on the board are:

England
Germany
Poland

There were 3 England and 3 German fans arrested for "brawling" (2 points each)

5 Germans, 1 English and 2 Pols arrested for general disturbance (1 point each)

and 2 england fans arrested for assault in Nuremberg (3 points each)

So the updated standings read like this

Germany: 11 points
England: 13 points
Poland: 2 points

There were also hundreds of England supporters singing songs about WWII in the city square of Nuremberg.... I would pay to see that!

Anyway, my money is on the Pols. I'm hoping they get knocked out early and their fans get all-stupid-like! But with three full weeks to go, it's still anyone's game!

The Hooligan Cup

Well, true to form 120 Germans and over 60 Pols were arrested today in Dortmund before the match between the two countries. I will be awarding points tomorrow AM, based on field reports from a couple of people... Stay tuned!

Liverpool.. errr, I mean Spain looked pretty good in the 4-0 thrashing of the Ukraine. (Fernando Torres said: "Shevchenko plus 10") I don't think the game matters much, with Saudi Arabia and Tunisia not expected to challange the two big European sides. (Although watch out for Tunisia, they are better than most people think.)

Ugh-Ly

France and the US, Portugal, England....

Lots of Ugly soccer from teams we expected more from. Just finished watch the France game... Not.Very.Good. Are they old? Or can they just not beat the Swiss (they tied their two qualifiers also.)

The U.S. looked like a team that didn't want to be there. They got completely blown away by the quicker, tougher and more skilled Czechs. I think the Czechs will be a formidable force moving forward in the Cup. They are big and strong, and between Nedved running around like a 24- year old instead of someone ten years to the senior, and Cech in goal- the Czechs could go really deep in this tourney. Unless of course they end up second in their group and have to play Brazil...

Hooligan Cup

No news on any arrests from Germany today... Got a tip? Send it to uhyesiam at yahoo.com, I promise full credit!

First game over

After all the hype, the first game of the cup proved...interesting. I'd give the Germans a C- for their performance. They had a tougher time with the Ticos than they should've. Wanchope's two goals show weakness in the German off-sides trap, which was beaten badly for two goals by an aging striker who, according to his own countrymen is basically washed up. Not good news for the Germans if they face a team like France, or Brazil with blinding pace up front. Costa Rica certainly was spunky faced with the daunting task of playing the hosts in the opening game. (Not that we would expect anything less.) They seemed content to play kick and run, which we're going to see a lot when the lower tier teams play top European or South America competition. The Germans clearly dominated the midfield, allowing them to work the ball forward quickly, which they did with nice crisp passing between the midfield (without Ballack) to their forwards. They also used the width of the pitch well, and to their advantage. I think their defensive lapses and lack of pace up front will ultimately spell their downfall this year, but they still should be odds on favorites to place top of group A. 30 minuts until Poland and Ecuador kicks off. I'm guessing we will see basically the same game, as the technically superior Pols should have no problem taking care of Le Tricolor. Prediction: 3-0 Poland

The All-Name Team

As with any great world wide compeition, there are some great names at this edition of the World Cup finals. Here at A Reminder, we have decided to put together the first, second and honorable mention All-Name teams* (One per team, with one wild card):

Honorable Mention:
Carlos Bonet- Paraguay
Iker Casillas- Spain (It's fun to yell E-KERRRR when he makes a good save. Watch a Real Madrid games with some of their fans, they do it every time)
Daniele De Rossi- Italy
Dan Quaye- Ghana (missing a letter, perhaps?)
Stan Lazaridis- Australia
Paul Ambrossi- Ecuador
Vratislav Lokvenc- Czech Rep
Armando Petit- Portugal
Shaka Hislop- Trinidad and Tobago (Gotta love yelling SHAKA. Also of note, Hislop attended Howard University in Washington DC)
Franciledo Santos- Tunisia (Plays in France, lives in France, born in France. Amazingly was made a naturalized citizen of Tunisa right before the '02 African Cup of nations)
Oguchi Onyewu- United States

Second Team:
Zlatan Ibrahimovic- Sweden (Sounds like he belongs in Croatia, Poland, or with the Czechs)
Viacheslav Scidevskiy- Ukraine (Plays for Arsenal... Arsenal Kiev)
Seweryn Gancarczyk- Poland
Ivica Dragutinovic- Serbia
Ho Lee- South Korea
Yahya Golmohammadi- Iran
Giles Yapi Yapo- Ivory Coast
Gneri Yaya Toure- Ivory Coast (It's fun to see those two names together)
Massamasso Tchangai- Togo (Name translates to "I thank god". Also wears number 5, drives a car with plate number "555" and lives in apartment 5)
Abdulaziz Khathran- Saudi Arabia
Alessandro Alex Santos- Japan (Yes, Japan. There are actually a lot of Japanese in Brazil and vice versa)

FIRST TEAM:

Jared Borgetti- Mexico. First Mexican to play in the English top flight (Bolton.) Upon hearing "Now Borgetti, the Mexican international" I did a triple-take. Name just couldn't be more Italian

Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink- Netherlands. Name derives from the merger of two farms (Yep, you guessed it, Vennegoor and Hesselink) in the Enshede region. Good God, I hope for his sake he was home-schooled...

Bosko Balaban- Croatia. BOSKO! I love it

Jean Alain Boumsong- France. One of many naturalized french citizens (Jean was actually born in Cameroon.) If he played in the NFL, he would have his own TD dance, and you damn well know it would be called "The Boumsong"

Bastian Schweinsteiger- Germany. The best possible German name. So much fun to say in a fake German accent. SVIENSTEIGER!.

Hakan Yakin- Switzerland. Imagine roll call in school? "Yakin, Hakan?"

Arsenio Love- Angola. 'nuff said

Jervis Drummond- Costa Rica. I love Jervis. It's not ex LSU SS Jeremetrius Butler, but close enough

Kaka- Brazil. One of the worlds best players, one of the worlds best names. As is the Brazilian custom, Kaka goes by just that one name, although it's actually a nickname. His given name at birth was Ricardo, but his younger brother couldn't say it. Kaka was the closest he could get and it stuck.

Fabricio Coloccini- Argentina. Lots of poop-joke possibilities here. Also owner of one of the WC's best spafros (or Spanish Afros for those of you not in the know. For further evidence, google Carlos Valderamma)

Fred- Brazil. I love the thinking. "Hey, I'm going to be a famous soccer player. I need to pick one name to go by... I've got it! Fred! No one will forget Fred!"

So there you have it, the 33 (ok 34) best WC names. You got a favorite name participating in this years WC? Add it to the comments and I'll run another list during the tourney. Also check back for the WC hall of names. I think Kaka has a chance at induction this year









*This is meant to be funny, if this offends you I suggest you refer to http://anonymouslefty.blogspot.com/2006/01/how-to-take-joke.html

The Hooligan Cup

Due to the (albeit small) percentage of fans who come to this years World Cup intent on starting fights with like-minded rival fans, we here at A Reminder have decided to award the first annual Hooligan Cup to honor their stupidity. Points are awarded based on arrests and serious injuries and will be culled from local police reports and updated daily. The point structure is as follows:

General Arrest (Disturbing the peace, unlawful gathering etc.)- 1 point
Arrest for actual fighting: 2 points
Arrest for causing bodily harm to another: 3 points
Arrest for violating the "no goose stepping" law: 3 points (Only applies to non-German or Italian groups)
Deportation/Being held until the end of the WC: 3 points
Arrest for using a weapon to injur another: 4 points
Arrest for violating the "no goose stepping" law: 5 points (Germans and Italians- (more points for doing something extra stupid))
Murder/Manslaughter/Arrest for causing the death of another: 15 points

Groups can also earn points for confirmed injuries as follows:

Cuts requiring stitches: 1 point
Head Trauma: 2 points
Broken bone: 3 points
Eye injuries: 4 points
Death: 15 points

Now some basic ground rules for earning points:

Fights can happen anywhere, but only fights between rival groups count toward the standings, a couple of drunk Germans pounding on some drunk Pols doesn't count here. Double points are awarded in the case of people being arrested while wearing fascist paraphanalia, just for the sheer stupidity.

Injuries caused in the stands of games do not count unless there is actual video proof of hooliganism. (For you people who aren't used to this sort of thing, you know it when you see it; trust me. Also as a general rule, people who are into this sort of thing can't get tickets to matches)

Now, we aren't going for a straight table of standings here- after all, this is the World Cup!

We've had a random draw and the groups shake out as follows: (Points will be awarded to teams for the duration of group play, the top two in each group will move on)

Group A:

Germany
Togo
Costa Rica
Czech Rep

Group B:

Brazil
Angola
U.S.A
Ukraine

Group C:

Australia
Poland
Italy
Iran

Group D:

Mexico
England
Spain
Ecuador

Group E:

Argentina
Paraguay
Sweden
Trinidad and Tobago

Group F:

Portugal
Ivory Coast
Serbia
South Korea

Group G:

Switzerland
The Netherlands
Croatia
Japan

Group H:

France
Tunisia
Saudi Arabia
Ghana

Clearly group C is the "group of death"

Poland is my early favorite after streaming a BBC radio report for inside Poland last week. Scary stuff. In years past, the Brits would be favorites to rack up a large amount of points, but their new travel restrictions (known hooligans have to turn in their passports and check into police stations daily) make them a less-sexy pick. Don't count out the hosts, who have known to tangle from time to time. Same thing with the Croats, the Serbs, the Czechs, or unknown but unstable Iran. With Brazil already grasping the Golden Orb, this may be the most interesting compeition this month!

Who will win ? Check back every day for updated standings!

2 DAYS!

Well, 2 days until kickoff. If you are here in the states, well then I hope your boss won't miss you for a couple of hours in the middle of each day. If you are in England, well I hope you work here (as my friend does)

From: Rachel Hansen

Sent: 04 June 2006 15:56

To: Cramer (All)

Subject: Football World Cup
The Football World Cup is nearly upon us and you may wish to watch certain games. You will need to agree with your manager whether it is possible from a business perspective for you to take one of the following options, either work different hours on the day of the match(es) you wish to watch or take as part of your annual vacation.
If you have any questions, please discuss with your manager.
Rachel Hansen

Head of Human Resources Cramer

Changing the Economics of Telecom

Confused about who to support for the world cup?

So some of you out there might be confused about which team you will be supporting during the world cup. Everyone needs a team, right? Well I thought I would come up with a set of rules for you to follow if you are interested in not looking like a douchebag in front of more serious soccer fans or even worse, foreigners.

1: If you are from the US, you are rooting for the US. At least until we get knocked out, which will either be in the group stage or shortly thereafter. Look, the citizens of every other country in the rest of the world view soccer not as an issue of life or death, but as something much more serious. Take some national pride, even if we aren't quite up to speed yet. (Don't even get me started on how many WC's the U.S. would've won if our best athletes played soccer. Can you imagine Lebron running at some poor small Spanish defender?)

I'll be rooting for the US, even though my favorite team is English (lifelong Arsenal fan,) and my favorite player is very, very french (Thierry Henry)

No excuses for this one really.

Now that we have that out of the way, some other rules as applies to indivdual matches:

Teams to root against: Germany, Argentina, Italy
Teams to root for: England, African teams, Iran

Why? The Germans are annoying, and it's especially fun to root against them when they play teams like Poland, England and France. They aren't that good, but they get a huge benefit by playing at home. (See: U.S. in 1994)

The Argentinians are basically the opposite of Brazil. They play tough and ugly, and have several players with ponytails

The Italians are the easiest to root against. Why? Italian soccer on a whole is boring. I'm not debating this, it's a fact. Too tactical, too defensive, too much whining and diving. Too many ponytails... It's just bad. Trust me.

Why are we rooting for England, African teams, and Iran? The country that invented the sport (England) has won its most prestigeous trophy exactly once. That was 40 years ago. They are also hampered by the fact that they tend to pick their team based on reputation and not skill (The reason Beckham is captain and Owen will start.) It's tough to win when you are constantly playing your 3rd or 4th best possible team.

African teams are fun. They play a fun attacking style. They have players you've never heard of, with sometimes hilariously funny names or nicknames (It's a translational thing). this year, the nations are generally small and poor, which makes it the month of a century for these people(see: Togo, or Ivory Coast if you can find them). Overall, nothing to lose in rooting for Togo or Angola to upset one of the big boys.

Iran: Who doesn't want to see Iran-U.S.? Seriously. (Not going to happen, but hey)

Additional rules:

If country X is playing and you are in a public place (pub or whatever) and everyone around is wearing jersey of country X or speaking the language spoken in country X you have three choices:

1. Root for country X very, very loudly
2: Watch the game in perfect silence. (Not even a fist pump)
3: Leave

You aren't going to root for the other team in this situation for any reason other than you are suicidal. Remember, this isn't like wearing a Yankee hat into Fenway. This would be more like wearing a Yankee uniform in Alabama in 1863.

Games involving the favorites:

Rooting for Brazil is only acceptable in the following circumstances:

1: They are playing Germany
2: The only teams remaining are Italy, Argentina and Germany
3: You have met a really, really hot Brazilian chick
4: Brazil is country X from above

Games involving the hosts:

When Germany is playing England, France, Poland, the U.S., Italy or Japan, or Argentina, please feel free to make as many jokes as possible in 90 minutes. (During qualification I was rooting very hard for Israel to qualify. They were close.)

Pick a second team:

I know this seems weird, but if you are American, pick a second team! Pick a country that really cares about soccer. (England is always a good choice, they tend to hate us the least.) It's fun to share in the ridiculous swings of emotions entire nations feel with every goal. Just remember, during most of the World Cup, you will be sitting at your desk. The rest of the world will be sitting in front of their TV's. Outside the US, The WC will be the lead story on every news cast, and on the front page of every newspaper


Tomorrow: laying out the groundrules for the hooligan standings!

The WORLD CUP is almost upon us:

Hey all,

In view of the upcoming world cup, I'll be doing previews and predictions for each and every stinking game. They will be informative and hopefully funny. I will also be doing some live-blogging of the group games, so as Eric Cantona says in those stupid commercials that should make us all fear Brazil a little bit more: "Watch this space"